This is not about falling in love.

This is not about falling in love or being held or being hungry and willing to take whatever you can get. This is not about shopping when you feel sad, the way your mom used to do with you, saying in the sweetest way, let’s get you a little something to perk you up. This is not about designer jeans with the right name on the back pocket, like the Jordache you had in elementary school.

This is not about getting what you want.

This is not about kindness or lack thereof, or hope or hopelessness. This is not about men you find on Tinder and how you bring them home sometimes, the wrong ones, because of that hunger. You are hungry.

This is not about your hunger or survival. This is not about your heart, as tender as it is, or about telling the truth, when you know the truth can kill things.

This is not about being wise or doing the right thing or being responsible. This is not about being good.

This is not about getting all those A pluses on your report card, or the short pleated skirt you wore as your cheerleading uniform, or that day you soiled your chair in Spanish class because you bled right through the little underwear that came with the skirt and you didn’t know if you should get up or run or just stay seated until everyone left.

This is not about that adorable little jumpsuit you got at Target yesterday, the one that will be perfect for Mexico, the one you got because it was only $20 and you were so, so sad, you had been crying all morning.

No it wasn’t about that.

Conscious Dating for Badass Babes: Both online + in person!

Oh boy. Dating is a wild ride, isn’t it? All that Tindering and matching and swiping can feel like too much sometimes… and leave us feeling jaded and resigned. More disconnected than connected. More fatigued than energized.

But… what if dating was one of the surest ways to grow your superpowers?
To build your courage, to grow your voice, to hone your intuition and feel more joy?

I believe dating is SUPER rich territory for personal growth. It’s accelerated soul work and a huge opportunity to lean into your authentic spirit and feel more self-love, power and aliveness right now. Not when you get the guy or the girl. But right now.

This workshop is for all you badass babes out there.

We know you because you are our people! You are wise + kind + brave and wondering why the heck you are still dating… You might be feeling frustrated and lost and tempted to stop trying altogether.

We get it. And we are here to bring more ease and joy into the process.

Spend the day with us – Christina Sanders, CPCC and Andrea Scher, CPCC – two coaches who also happen to be badass babes out in the dating world like you!

We will explore:

  • Your dating mindset and the stories are getting in the way of your joy. You will come away with a new narrative – one that feels authentic and also empowers and serves you on your dating adventures.
  • Dating profile as manifesting tool. Getting clear on who we are calling in and what our vision is for the relationships we are manifesting.
  • Honing our intuition: Our full body yeses and no’s. How to tune into our intuition long before we even go on the first date!
  • How to bring more joy to the process.
  • How to set solid boundaries, use our voices powerfully to manifest the relationships we truly want, and tell the truth more quickly and easily.
  • Feng shui-ing our dating life: How to let go of straggling connections and how to say no with grace and ease.
  • How to be compassionate with yourself though the ups and downs – from the thrill of new connection to the tender disappointments and rejection.
  • How to raise your vibe so that you are embodying the feelings of being in love, right now.
  • How your attachment style might be getting in the way + so much more!

Workshop details:
Sunday, March 11th, 2018
10am – 4pm
Location tbd in Berkeley/Oakland area
$195


   :::REGISTER BELOW:::



P.S. Don’t live in the bay area? You can join in the online version! Coming soon… Hit reply if you are interested + would like a special earlybird discount code!

 

Sneak peek into my new course – Choosing Ease!

Here’s the good news folks: We don’t have to wait for perfect circumstances to be able to find a place of ease inside. 

Have you ever had an experience that was supposed to be “hard” but turned out to be pretty lovely? I’m going to give you an example. But first, let me tell you about a ritual we used to do with Ben before he would go to sleep at night. It went something like this:

Ben: “What was your favorite part of the day?”
Me: “My favorite part was riding that big bicycle along the water.”
Ben: “That was my favorite part!”
Ben: “What was your favorite part daddy?”
Matt: “Let’s see, my favorite part was swimming in the pool with you.”
Ben: “That was my favorite part too!”

As you can probably tell, whatever you would say, it would be Ben’s favorite part too. After doing this for a while, I noticed a little habit of collecting favorite parts throughout the day to bring home to Ben.

As I headed to the doctor’s lab waiting to get my blood drawn one day, I thought of our ritual and started looking for favorite parts. Driving around for twenty minutes looking for parking? Not my favorite part. Getting blood drawn? Definitely not gonna be my favorite part, I thought. (I get super nervous and usually cry or pass out when I get a blood test)

But I imagined seeing the same moment through Ben’s eyes… and while I was with the technician I imagined how this could be my favorite part. As this question entered my mind, I saw the sweetness in the man’s eyes when I told him I didn’t feel well and I saw how connected he was when the tears started pouring down my face.

I noticed how he held my gaze and said, “You are safe with me. Nothing is going to happen to you. I’ve got you…”and how that made me cry even more. (Who was this angel man?) I noticed how he tried to talk to me about Alicia Keys, about how she was classically trained and writes her own songs and most artists don’t do that and how she deserved those Grammy’s… and I understood that he was trying to keep my mind on something else… I noticed all of it. And because I asked myself how this could be my favorite part, I could see something holy in it.

I could see how the favorite parts aren’t necessarily just the fun ones, but the ones where we see beyond the superficial into the sacred.

Our experience is often about where we put our attention. And the stories we layer on to an otherwise neutral occurrence. Blood draw. Just is. Totally neutral.

But I arrived at the clinic with a particular narrative- Blood draws. Bad. I hate blood draws. Blood draws scare me. I pass out when I get shots. Why do I have to do this? Poor me. What if the person doesn’t know what they’re doing? I hate this. 

What made the difference was interrupting that habitual story with a new one – even for a moment – in the form of a question. What if this was my favorite part of the day? (That’s crazy, some part of me responded. Impossible.)

But I held the question just long enough to notice this man’s face. His compassion. His willingness to see me not as his next “patient” but as another vulnerable human being sitting with him. This pause, this moment suspended, was enough to open up a little oasis – one where the story became different.

We mostly miss these moments.

But one of the gifts of being vulnerable is that we are cracked open. Even just a little bit. We are porous. Kindness (even the smallest varieties) can seep in more easily. When I am the most vulnerable I notice even the smallest gestures and my heart fills with gratitude. Vulnerable moments are the best places to practice this.

Have you had a moment like the one I described?

A moment when you were vulnerable, softer than usual, maybe even cracked open + someone offered you something from their heart? Something real, something kind, and you were able to let it in? Maybe it was even your favorite part? A moment of ease, well-being, connection, intimacy inside a very imperfect circumstance.

P.S. Did this piece resonate for you? If so, join me in exploring Choosing Ease! The delight starts Monday.

CSP #26: How to Stop Feeling Like Sh*t with Andrea Owen

Andrea Owen is an author, mentor, and certified life coach who helps high-achieving women let go of perfectionism, control, and isolation and choosing courage and confidence instead. She has helped thousands of women manage their inner-critic to create loving connections and live their most kick-ass life.

She is the proud author of How to Stop Feeling Like Sh*t: 14 Habits that Are Holding You Back from Happiness

 

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Choosing Ease – My brand new course!

Dear Ones,

I’m calling in ease this year. 

I have goals + dreams of course, but when I ask myself how I want to feel? It’s spacious, buoyant, joyful… as much of the time as possible.

So many of us are addicted to struggle… we think life needs to be hard, or that we need to work hard for what we have for it to have any value.

I believe in ease.

I believe that when I am creating from a place of ease and buoyancy I am actually in flow – in alignment with myself and the Universe. Things feel more fun and playful. I enjoy my life more. I am able to be more present. I am in delicious co-creation with the universe.

Are you calling in more ease this year too?

If so, join me and a classroom full of kindred spirits for five weeks of creating more ease in your life right now – no matter what your circumstances are.

In this course, we will explore:

Week #1: The Mindset of Ease
What if this was fun and easy? This is a question I ask myself all the time. It immediately rights my ship and helps me find an elegant solution to whatever I am wrestling with. This week will be about shifting our mindset from one of struggle to one of ease.

Week #2: Clearing Space
Clearing our physical space + our calendar to make more room for ease. We will explore setting boundaries, perfectionism and we will identify where we can make space for  simplicity. We will practice allowing things to be good enough, not perfect.

Week #3: Cultivating Self-Compassion
This is possibly the most important of all. Creating a habit of relating to ourselves with kindness.

Week #4: Getting into Alignment and Flow
Alignment is the new hustle peeps!
We will look at creating from the quantum model – one where we get into alignment before we take action. It’s not about more effort equals more results, it’s about right effort equals right results. 

Week #5: How Authenticity Creates Ease
Leaning into who we actually are. Identifying our strengths + gifts and allowing what feels most organic and natural to us to be front and center. 
We will also explore how our perceived flaws can be our gold.

The ease + delight begins Monday, February 5th, 2018 – just $99 

P.S. If you don’t like to read all the mumbo jumbo, here it is in one sentence (easy peasy!) – 5 weeks of creating more joy through adopting an ease mindset, growing our self-compassion and clearing space for what we truly want! It’s going to be life-shifting and good.