Things to remember.

handful_treasures_700

Handful of seaglass, Baker Beach, SF

Don’t miss this. Pay attention. Wake up. Be kind and gentle.

The world is a manifestation of your beliefs, so believe good things. Things that empower you. Things that delight you. Stay in the light.

People will die. Remember this, but don’t let it paralyze you. Let this allow you to pick up the phone, even when you don’t want to. To put down your armor. To say I love you more.

Write thank-you notes by hand. The kind they will tuck into their wallet and will pull out years later. The paper will feel soft like fabric and their heart will swell.¬†Except you won’t know this.

When you can, let people ahead of you in traffic. It’s kind and it will make you feel good + generous. It will make you feel powerful, that you could give this one good thing. So go ahead. Let them in.

Tell the truth. And by truth, I mean the messy kind. Like a few months ago when you were crying on the couch feeling lonely, tender, disconnected. And you shouted from the couch, “I need you to love me right now!” and it was the hardest thing + the truest thing you had said in a long time and you cried and cried as he rubbed your back.

Things to remember.

Eat cake when you go to a birthday party. I don’t care what kind of cleanse you’re on.

Learn the what-does-the-fox-say dance and dress up like one of the foxy fly girls for Halloween. Or the Thriller dance or the Cup Song. Learn something that’s been on your mental list – ukulele, italian, how to make kombucha – it doesn’t matter. Just keep learning.

Lay down next to Ben before he falls asleep. Take in his messy boy scent. Notice how he wraps all of his limbs around you in a kind of choke hold, but enjoy it because it won’t last forever.

All of this. It won’t last forever.

What’s on your list of things to remember?

 

24 Comments

  1. Posted November 20, 2013 at 4:57 pm | Permalink

    This is beautiful Andrea!

  2. Posted November 20, 2013 at 5:13 pm | Permalink

    Outstanding post!

  3. Posted November 20, 2013 at 5:14 pm | Permalink

    So many good things! I want to remember some of these, too. I am doing my best to take in and hold onto my happy cuddly baby and every day I think that this time is so short and he’ll be 6 feet tall before I know it.

  4. Jennifer
    Posted November 20, 2013 at 5:15 pm | Permalink

    I needed to hear this today. Thanks you.

  5. Kristen
    Posted November 20, 2013 at 6:03 pm | Permalink

    That a happy mommy makes for a happy family. Take care of me too.

  6. Marilee Pittman
    Posted November 20, 2013 at 7:09 pm | Permalink

    love this!

  7. Lisa
    Posted November 20, 2013 at 8:54 pm | Permalink

    Thank you

  8. Tara
    Posted November 20, 2013 at 9:12 pm | Permalink

    Thank you.

  9. Posted November 20, 2013 at 9:45 pm | Permalink

    (((Heart!!!)))

  10. Posted November 21, 2013 at 1:04 am | Permalink

    An ordinary legacy in the making my dear, brava.

  11. Posted November 21, 2013 at 1:08 am | Permalink

    That an afternoon at the dog park is way more soul replenishing than any time spent in front of technology.

  12. Deborah Baldizar
    Posted November 21, 2013 at 1:00 pm | Permalink

    BEAUTY-filled post Andrea. Tears on a Thursday morning. Thank you.

  13. Posted November 21, 2013 at 5:57 pm | Permalink

    Beautiful. Winged straight to my heart.

    * That physical and mental discomfort will not kill you.

  14. Posted November 21, 2013 at 11:30 pm | Permalink

    I want to remember that it’s okay to forget to do some of these things as long as I start doing them again as soon as I do remember.

    I want to remember that even when the kids are 20 and 17, as mine are, they still like to hug and cuddle and tell me silly stories. They still try to find ways to wrap themselves around me. They still like getting their backs scratched and their faces kissed. And I love that they still want to be around me and be in my arms.

    I want to remember that there are folks like you who are always willing to remind me to remember the good stuff and to eat the birthday cake. I love that one.

  15. Posted November 21, 2013 at 11:48 pm | Permalink

    1. Go outside everyday. All. Year. Long.
    2. When you feel like yelling, get down at their eye level and lower your voice. Love will happen.
    3. Talk to him after work, after dinner, when your PMSing, when you don’t feel like it. Ask how is your spirit today?
    4. Remember to stop and wonder, what do I care enough about to do right now? (It is not the dishes or putting all their shoes in the shoe baskets you made but they won’t use)
    5. Listen to his music cause he’s 10 and if wants to hang out with you, cool.
    6. Don’t worry too much about them, they know they’re loved and worthy all the time. The other stuff is smallfries compared to that (as you know so well).
    7. Be bold and daring and juicy even if it means you end up looking like a smurf (facebook page above for proof). Embrace your color inside and out.
    8. Stop trying to taper the antidepressants, even in summer. It doesn’t work and everyone loses. Allow this small gift to yourself.
    9. Be open to giving and receiving small gifts of love as much as possible

    Thank you Andrea for your always authentic and beautiful writing.
    Nina

  16. Posted November 22, 2013 at 1:19 am | Permalink

    Nina – I had to have to say I love #8 – the perspective on this is so true. WHat a beautiful list on response to a beautiful post.

  17. Ewa
    Posted November 22, 2013 at 7:39 am | Permalink

    Thank you Andrea, I love your writing. Thanks for all the comments as well. wow..

  18. Posted November 23, 2013 at 3:29 pm | Permalink

    Oh so beautiful… Xox

  19. JoFinney
    Posted November 24, 2013 at 5:26 pm | Permalink

    Another gorgeous, soul-satisfying post. It reminded me of this, another great list: http://creativewithkids.com/100-ways-to-be-kind-to-your-child/

  20. Posted November 24, 2013 at 6:38 pm | Permalink

    apparently a more accurate translation of ‘mindfulness’ is ‘remembering’. its why we need to be reminded, of presence, of why. good list. there is so much worth remembering, and its always good to be reminded. that is why there is always enough room for the work we do.

  21. Shosh
    Posted November 25, 2013 at 9:24 am | Permalink

    “The days are long but the years are short” – a poster on the wall of my daughter’s nursery, that I look at when she wakes up at 4 am and won’t go back to sleep : )

  22. Posted December 3, 2013 at 12:04 pm | Permalink

    This lifted my spirits. Thanks a lot

  23. Posted December 3, 2013 at 12:06 pm | Permalink

    Learn to give the things you would like to be given to you. If you want love, give love. If you want money, be a giver of it.

    (if you want good comments on your blog, give good comments on others’ blogs lol)

  24. Posted December 6, 2013 at 1:05 am | Permalink

    Painfull sweet. Incredibly touching.

    I’m relieved I’m not the only one who knows about What Does the Fox Say? :D

2 Trackbacks

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    […] once in awhile I get wrapped up my life and I forget lots of important things. Posts like this from Andrea Scher are good reminders about the things that are important and that are worth […]

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